perfectreverie

There is an ever flowing melody to life
A great song to be played, repeating over and over again
A great joy, A great sorrow, A great stillness
You have been all to me this
You have been the rythmn in my voice
as I sang the song of my existance
just as my heart has beat, your thoughts have kept my time
one and two and three and four and...
You have wrapped me in your own melody
directed to me to your own time and rythmn
Slowly comming together- matching pitch and count
one and two and three and four and...
A naked longing in my song for you
In my heart, I know I need you always
Your soul bending and melting into mine
Wanting to know you always, feel you there
Keep you, hold you, feel you, breathe you in
Take you in and touch your face gingerly
one and two and three and four and....
one and two and three and four and....
one and two and three and four and....

Erin Peach,

I work with your sister now. YES. Kelly.

new writing blog on www.thewritingonthewalls.com

check it.

Well, I decided that I am going to start the South Beach diet and today is my second day on it. I decided that I was sick and tired of being tired, over weight for my height as well as not being satisfied with how I looked. I am going to try to loose twenty pounds or so... if things are going good maybe a little more!

I am going to use LJ as a source of journaling to help me keep track of my progress.

So far today, I have consumed:

(at 3:20 pm)

almost 48 oz of water
2 skim milk cheese string cheese
1/2 of a South Beach Diet (hereby known as SBD) meal (i ate the chicken out of it because I thought the green beans were DISGUSTING)
and i'm currenlty drinking 2cups of Skim Milk for a little boost

my afternoon snack will be tuna fish with a little mayo mixed in

dinner? who knows?

[1*] First grade teacher's name: mrs. car

[2*] Last words you said: awww

[3*] Last song you sang: we were meant for so much more by switchfoot

[4*] Last person you hugged: pat

[5*] Last thing you laughed at: Joanne

[6*] Last time you said I dont remember: ummmm i dont remember?

[7*] Last time you cried: this AM when i got into a fight with pat

[*PRESENT*]

[9*] What color socks are you wearing: none!

[10*] What's under your bed: a couple boxes of crizzap

[11*] What time did you wake up today: um like 9:40

[12*] Current taste: nothing :(

[13*] Current hair: teal unicorn bandanna because i'm a hippie

[15*] Current annoyance: headaches and being bored to death at work

[16*] Current longing: a kiss.... or some peanut butter cups... its a tough call

[17*] Current desktop background: Patrick playing poker

[18*] Current worry: making it through everything

[19*] Current hate: HEADACHES

[20*] Current favorite article of clothing: my black bra that almost always holds me in (checks) yup its working.

[21*] Favorite physical feature of the preferred sex: eyes.. must have beautiful eyes..... i <# pat's eyes.

[22*] Last CD that you listened to: North by Something Corporate

[23*] Favorite place to be: my room at my desk or pat's arms :)

[24*] Least favorite place: Work?

[25*] Time you wake up in the morning: usually between 8-8:45 so i can be to work at 10....

[26*] If you could play an instrument, what would you play: You. um...... I WANNA PLAY MY ORGAN BUT IT BLEW UP!!! :(

[27*] Favorite color: GREEN :)

[28*] Do you believe in an afterlife: Yes

[29*] How tall are you: 5'6

[30*] Current favorite word/saying: What? Huh? KITTY!!!

[31*] Favorite book: Series: the Belgariad.

[32*] Favorite season: spring

[33*] One person from your past you wish you could go back to see/help: myself from being stupid

[*FUTURE*]

[35*] Where do you want to go for university?: ideally Hood College, but that ain't happenin so Towson

[36*] What is your career going to be like: good question

[37*] How many kids do you want: 1 or 2

[*HAVE YOU EVER...*]

[39*] Said "I love you" and meant it?: yep

[40*] Gotten in a fight with your dog/cat/bird/fish, etc: All the time...

[41*] Been to New York: nope!

[42*] Been to Florida: yup

[43*] Been to California: no... but washington.. which is kind of close right?

[44*] Been to Hawaii: nope!

[45*] Been to Mexico: Yes, Cozumel

[46*] Been to China: no...

[48*] Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: actually yes lol several times

[*RANDOM*]

[52*] Do you have a crush on someone: nope

[53*] What book are you reading now?: none.... I finished Flowers in teh Attic

[54*] Worst feeling in the world: rejection

[55*] What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: do i have to wake up?? do i have to move?? i'm soooo comfy

[56*] How many rings before you answer: 3

[57*] Future daughter's name: no clue

[58*] Future son's name: Noah or maybe Aidan

[59*] Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: no, but I sleep with a furry animal.... SAVVY THAT"S MY PILLOW!!!

[60*] If you could have any job you wanted: I would go after it :)

[61*] Wish you were there: meow?

[62*] College plans: no clue at this point

[63*] Piercings: 2... ears

[*THE EXTRA STUFF*]

[64*] Do you do drugs: nope

[65*] Do you drink: only on new years

[67*] What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use: whatever i feel like when I go to the store :)

[68*] What are you most scared of: loosing those i love

[69*] What clothes do you sleep in: tank top and pajama pants or tshirt and panties

[70*] Who is the last person that called you: ummm pri pat

[71*] Where do you want to get married: somewhere outside

[72*] If you could change anything about yourself what would that be: mm there's a few things

[73*] Who do you really hate: don't ask me this

[74*] Been In Love: Absolutely

[75*] Are you timely or always late: usually timely

[76*] Do you have a job: yup

[77*] Do you like being around people: sometimes but i need my alone time too

[78*] Best feeling in the world: being loved

[79*] Are you for world peace: yeah if it was possible

[80*] Are you a health freak: i wish

[81*] Do you have a "Type" of person you always go after: must be DORK.

[82*] Do you want someone you don't have? nope

[83*] Are you lonely right now: yeah i'm alone at work

[84*] Ever afraid you'll never get married: not really

[85*] Do you want to get married: yes

[86*] Do you want kids? one or two.... any more hell spawn and i'll go bonkers

[*IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...*[

[87*] Cried: yes

[88*] Bought Something: yes...dinner for me and pat

[89*] Gotten Sick: headache?

[90*] Sang: yup

[91*] Said I Love You: yup

[92*] Wanted To Tell Someone You Loved them: yup and i did

[93*] Met Someone: nope

[94*] Moved On: nothing to move on from

[95*] Talked To Someone: yes

[96*] Had A Serious Talk: yeah... not fun :(

[97*] Missed Someone: yess

[98*] Hugged Someone: yep

[99*] Yelled at Someone: not really

[100*] Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: nope

CALLING ALL THOSE WHO HAVE O- BLOOD TYPE

if you have this blood type please contact the below person

loetzusmc



His infant is going in for heart surgery this friday/saturday and there is a blood shortage of their type. The baby is only o- and therefore can only take this blood type. PLEASE COMMENT IF YOU CAN HELP SO I CAN HELP CONTACT THIS PERSON IMMEDIATELY.


Thank you

((you guys have a chance to make a real difference, please get up off your butts!))

I work a job that pays really well and has awesome benefits... but I've realized that it doesn't make me happy. Perhaps I'll never be happy. I don't feel like I am helping people the way that I was meant to, the way I felt I was born to help people, I feel like i'm wasting my gifts like some fading star.

I don't write anymore. I find it too difficult and taxing. Its as if all this technology has reaped me of the ability to speak and write as I once did. I find myself so exhausted all the time.

I want to go back to school. At the moment, I'm a college drop out in my eyes. Yeah I"m making the money and I"m doing well for being said 'college drop out'. But, I'm incredibly intelligent! I could be doing so much more. Right now I'm contemplating going back and finishing my psychology degree and going pre med to become a psychiatrist. So much work though- I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if I have enough strength to do it. I'm weak. I know I could but i'm worried about becomming bored and tired.

Patrick and I are still doing well. We just hit two months. We had some patches that were a little rough, but hey- nothing that's easy is really worth it. You have to work for something- you have to want something badly, sometimes you hafta bleed and cry for it. Perhaps I should take my ideology about relationships and apply it to my career ambitions.

As some of you know, I work for the Baltimore Sun. One reporter, hearing that I'm from Harford County and a graduate of CMW wanted to know if there was anyone that would be willing to talk to him about Zapola being charged- mainly about Zapola's background as a teacher at CMW.

I told him I would ask, but I made no promises. I know everyone's feelings about the whole media being envolved with this already. Please don't haze me or send me mean messages. I honestly think that this has been blown out of proportion.

Sea Glass

Long ago, I’d watch the sea
Marveled at its massiveness, the molten blue-silver cast green
Deeper than my imagine can fathom
It touched me in a way that no one else could conceive
It reaped me clean of sufferance, of impurities, of wrong doings of others
I would become an empty vessel, still slightly cracked
I was permanently broken- but hey, what can I really say?
Aren’t we all a little cracked?
Then it would fill me back up with wonder, with amazement.
I would feel so full and I could not explain.
I’d always wonder why I had such a love affair,
With the sea, that is.
Then I looked into your eyes, the color of sea glass
The molten blue-silver cast green
And I felt my whole being halt
I suddenly felt empty; I suddenly felt full.
My breath caught in my throat and my eyes went wide
I guess I always had such a love affair with the sea,
Just because you were the sea.
I swear, I knew you before- and know I know why.
Just because you were the sea.

1. I will tell you what song reminds me of you.
2. I will tell you what celebrity/public/fictional person you remind me of, either personality-wise or looks-wise.
3. I will give you one word that I associate with you when I think of you.
4. I will tell you what color(s) I associate with you.
Then steal this for your journal and make someone else's day as well.

Becki,

I was doing some reaserach about possibly renting a cabin down in Cherokee, the prices aren't that bad. Either 900 for the week or 1350.. and that's total for the cabin. If I get my new car, we can take my new car and perhaps get 4 or 5 ppl to go which would bring the cabin rental down to...225 for the whole week (if we get 4 ppl) and maybe everyone chip in for groceries. Perhaps spring break?

I got a 4.0 this semester again. Now, I have a 3.92 over all. :)

I think I lost IQ points while watching Alexander.

From Sami Grabus:

(A) First, recommend to me:
1. a movie:
2. a book:
3. a musical artist, song, or album:

(B) I want everyone who reads this to ask me three questions, no more, no less. Ask me anything you want.

(C) Then I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends to ask you anything & say that you stole it from me.

Take the quiz: "What Kind of Soul Do You Retain?"

Tortured
You aren't sure how to feel, and this leaves you constantly in distress about what you do and who you are. You are tortured in the fact you can't run OR hide.

Take the quiz: "What Kind of Soul Do You Retain?"

Loving
You have a very warm and loving aura about your soul and believe in the virtues of Love. To you, there is a bright side to everything! You are the polar opposite of the Dark soul.

My idealized man:

- would sing to me
- would be taller than me
- would have brown hair
- would have distinctive eyes
- would be fair skinned
- would have a little more weight on him that he should
- would be able to program in at least 2 programming languages
- would have a fire in him
- would be passionate
- would find joy and amazement in me
- would love me immediately for what i was, but would hold it in until he was sure
- would be my best friend
- would be extremely intelligent and challenge me mentally
- would ignite a fire in me
- would embrace me without fear
- would find me enchanting
- wouldn't find me annoying
- would love my singing
- would encourage me
- would hug and kiss me in public
- would be a moderate republican
- would have deep eyes
- would have a smile in his eyes when he saw me
- would write for me
- would want to see me at every chance he got
- would stay by me, but still give me space that I need to survive
- would appreciate my busy and hectic schedule
- would love my corny puns (assalt and buttery!)
- would have a strong belief system (but does not have to be my own)
- would be able to hold his ground in an argument
- would be willing to fight for what he believes in
- would be willing to fight for me
- would stick up for me
- would suprise me with little things, like an occasional note or showing up to work
- would ideally be native american in some part
- would respect my native american culture and point of view
- would NEVER say "Andy Jackson was a God"
- would listen to alternative music and encourage me going to local band shows
- would just hold me for a few hours and do nothing but breathe
- would let me fall asleep in his arms and just be safe
- would not care about my past
- would not find my past scary or alarming
- would believe in me, no matter what
- would be able to play an instrument (or sing)
- more to come

Ah... single again. Seriously, I must be jinxed or something.

Also, someone needs to make sure i don't watch scary tv shows or movies. I just watched a show about a haunted house and now i'm all creepified. I am SO exhausted... i've been up for 20 hours right now....i can stay up for something like 36 or 38 hours straight.... but i don't feel like it and i need to be able to function tomorrow. I"m only working 14 hrs this week. SUCK. I am poor, I need to earn some money....I really hope that my election judging paycheck comes in soon. That's $150, then i can work for Army Research Lab on friday for $40 for four hours... but i would like to volunteer at the arc that day :/.

I only have $10 to last me until friday. suck. Wait, $7 because i had to buy some excedrine migrane when I was out today. Like, I could put things on my credit card... but i don't want to. I can't wait until i'm out of debt... lol...

damnit, i can't remember if i go in at 4:30 or 6:30 on wednesday...I was a write in on the schedule... so i don't know.

I feel like shit. I really do. I'm trying to keep a smile on my face adn look plesant.. but it just seems like i have the worst luck with EVERYTHING. i'm out to attempt ot get some sleep.

I saw a star beneath the stairs
Glowing through the melting walls
Who will be the first to begin their fall?
Or will we become one?

Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I the ghost upon the stage, am I your anything?

I saw a star beneath the stairs
Glowing bright before descent
And in the morning, there is nothing left, but what's inside of me

Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I the ghost upon the stage, am I your anything?
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I the ghost upon the stage, am I your anything?

And I don't want to, die tonight will you believe in me
And I don't, want to fall into the light

Will you wish upon, will you walk upon me?
I don't wanna die tonight

Will you believe in me tonight?

Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I the ghost upon the stage, am I your anything?
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I the ghost upon the stage, am I your anything?

You Are From Neptune

You are dreamy and mystical, with a natural psychic ability. You love music, poetry, dance, and (most of all) the open sea. Your soul is filled with possibilities, and your heart overflows with compassion. You can be in a room full of friendly people and feel all alone. If you don't get carried away with one idea, your spiritual nature will see you through anything.

Wow, that really fits me to a tee, especially those of you who know me really well. I love the sea... oh god... i want to go back out to see again. She purges you empty and then fills your vessel back again.

Aquarius - Your Love Profile Your positive traits: You've got a ton of friends, so you have no problem meeting new people. You're great at thinking up new things and actitives to do with your sweetie. You tend to let the little things slide in relationships... and focus on the bigger picture. Your negative traits: In relationships, it tends to be your way or the highway. You can never open up completely to someone - you have to keep parts of yourself secret. You're cold and reserved, which leaves your partner feeling unloved. Your ideal partner: Flexible, because you're not going to be the one to compromise! Is smart and quirky with lots of weird interests... including you. A true indivdualist who doesn't care what anyone thinks Your dating style: Stimulating. You prefer dates that explore a shared interest - like a lecture, muesum tour, or concert. Your seduction style: Wacky. Your wild ideas have your lover wondering what's next. Insatiable - it takes a lot to satisfy your desires. Varied. You're eager to try things as soon as you learn about them. Tips for the future: Bring a little responsibility to your relationship - like showing up for dates! Compromise a little. It would kill you to do things your lover's way for once. Be aware of your parnter's jealousy. Even though you aren't jealous, realize your partner is sometimes. Best place to meet someone online: Match.com - there's enough singles to find offbeat dates and tons of romantic adventure Best color to attract mate: Sky blue Best day for a date: Wednesday Get your free love profile at Blogthings.